The title of this entry originated from a part of Tracy’s "note of
thanks" (that’s how we call our valedictory speech in UST). She’ll be
saying it proud later, but she and Amiel gave me a sneak preview of
their speeches as early as two weeks ago.
Tracy had been
told to change the word, "shatter" because it sounds heavy plus the
fact that it could just appeal to the philosophical community. Amiel,
perhaps for the inclusion of Fr. Ferriols, "ilundag mo beybe" safely
passed the jurors. Probably, they found the phrase cute, but am not
sure if everyone will have a grasp of what it truly means.
Nonetheless, he was also adviced to reduce the metaphysical undertones
of his address of petition (and that’s the thomasian way of calling
"salutation").
Amiel and Trace made highly existential
speeches, close to being metaphysical but is very much meaningful. I
am proud of the way these two (and the other 30ish) brilliant minds
absorbed philosophy. As their welfare under my "loving" custody is
coming to a technical close, I could but pray that they will carry on
with their quest for meaning. I’ll miss them sitting in my class,
raising good questions — nodding, even if I know that they’re already
half asleep (thanks for the support guys). Benjo reciting in class
while converting everything to Lacan or Levinas. Kris Martus or
Voltaire getting my microphone because I talk low and slow, and I need
to be heard because we always talk along a "process". I shall miss
them lurking around AB and at the eccle library, because of their
research work, or in the case of the matronas — sightseeing
a few good philosophers. TGR and the boys’ team complaining about the
popularity of eccle’s wonder twins. Perhaps not at YM, but I will
surely miss these kids’ actual company – pulling me out of the
Faculty room for some short talks and hearty laughs. Robert, dropping
me off in front of sir bob, Rommel sharing his all-time hit jokes, JP
harassing Peter and Peter talking of Wojtyla. The girls tracing
friendster-dot-coms among themselves. The guys dreaming of becoming
champions in basketball, and in engaging the lower years in their
"philosophical" games. I shall miss everyone trying to have a grab of
the microphone (during videoke sessions) with Tracy and Levi as the
usual winners. The good talks, Kali’s "new beginning" and many
others.
I am so proud of what these kids have become, and
Trace and Amiel’s speeches will simply reveal. I am praying that they
will always be spurred by the same interest for truth and meaning that
they have right now. I am praying that their idealisms will never
falter. I am so proud that they are able to recognize that philosophy
is not but a rite of passage to another degree, to an occupation or so
- but to a better self, and to better decisions in life. When
requested to remove the term "shatter" from her speech, I advised Tracy
to disobey and retain it, and she said that she also intends to do so.
EVERYBODY DESERVES THAT HEAVY WORD. Having heard that, I was so happy
– this call for an authentic experience deserves to be heard. And
yes, the call could only come from a philosopher — an authentic
philosopher.
True enough, we need to shatter accidents in
order to arrive at meaning. And at times, we need to jump from our
comfort zones. The things that used to numb our thoughtful sensibility
to and for life, needs to annihilated. We are all confronted by a
complicated world, the human challenge is to find ourselves in its
midst and to conquer the world through decisions that we can die for.
It is true that we dwell in the world, but it is also true that we have
to act upon that same world. More than history and perhaps anything
else, the most sovereign entity in this enterprise is man who grabs his
life’s steering wheel and determines the path he wishes to tread. This
man is always entitled to his choice of path, but reason and the drive
for authentic existence could just lead him to the truth and good –
and of course we talk not of those we carelessly dictate, but of the
objective and authentic ones. To shatter, nonetheless, implies a kind
of rebuilding. It is the moment where we identify ourselves apart from
what we do not essentially need. In this stage, decisions can’t be
made just for pleasure, fun or perhaps because it’s cute or gay. To
shatter the artificial world means to choose for what is right and to
die for it, to succumb into the difficulty, not because suffering makes
an act noble, but because it is the only way to conquer the obstacles
to an authentic life. It happens when we choose to give up the things
that we could be entitled to, but are nonetheless unimportant to what
we intend to become. To shatter means to sacrifice, for the sake of
something higher. It means intentionally going beyond, because staying
in the usual cage would only lead to a creation of endless and
pointless circles. To shatter means to grab the chance of soaring high,
not because what’s up there is cute; but because through shattering,
one becomes free.
This teacher, this intellectual midwife, or
perhaps mother, is proud to hear her children speak of their thoughts
and hearts that had been crystallized by four meaningful years of
academic discipline. I am so proud, truly proud.
I have to
warn you my beloved that life wouldn’t be as easy as how it had been in
college. (uhhm, had it been easy for you guys anyway) But you’re
fully-packed, very much loaded, it’s just a matter of carrying on with
the battle. With what you have right now, soar high and make us
prouder. Continue your pilgrimage. Should you come back, you’re
forever welcome.
